A Diabolical 6th Grade Plan

In my sixth grade Language Arts class, we had to create a newspaper for an assignment.

I do not remember the specifics, but we worked in small groups. I took on the classified ads section of the paper. It was an opportunity to show off my creativity.

Please understand that in sixth grade I was a runt and unsure of myself. I was in no way a class clown and it would be years before I started to write because I liked it.

How do you show off your creativity in the classified ads section of a sixth grade newspaper?

You write school appropriate jokes. (It's almost impossible to make a sixth grader laugh with a school appropriate joke, so I was in over my head.)

It's one of the few things I remember writing in my younger school days. Well, that and a research paper about cows in the fourth grade.

Due to fear of failure and rejection, I did something bold (and not bold as in a courageous way).

A diabolical plan was devised.

Here was my evil and genius two step plan:

First, I would sign someone else's name in my group on the ads and have the others read it.

Second, if they thought the jokes were funny, I would claim them. If they thought them to be stupid, I would deny writing them to the bitter end.

Talk about some weak tea!

Luckily for me (and my potential fall guy), the first person who read it belly laughed.

I was able to boldly claim the jokes. Needless to say, the fall guy's whose name I forged was confused and irritated. But that didn't matter because I had jokes. I was funny. The old switcheroo worked, which actually made me more funny to my group.

For some reason that memory keeps popping into my head lately.

It's reminding me of how often fear invades our life. We want someone to take our failure and rejection, but we want glory for our success.

This week I started writing a book.

I'm fearful of the possibility of failure.

This fear is heighten because everyday for the last two years I've jokingly told people, "When I write the next best seller…" I've unintentionally created an unreal expectation for myself.

I'm so fearful that when my wife glances at my notes it takes everything I have not to flop on them like a fish. I'm wondering whose name I can sign on it in case it sucks and deny that it is my work until the bitter end. Then, I start to wonder if it's worth my time.

There always comes a time when something you have to do clashes with fear of failure and rejection.

But you already knew that.

So what do you do when fear comes crashing in on you?

I type the next word to make the next sentence that will make the next paragraph that will make the next chapter. Try not focus on the fear, but on the task that God has placed before you.

What are you afraid to do that you know you have to?