Crappy Christian Gifts

What do you buy your Christian friend or family member for Christmas?

I happen to be an expert on this, partly because I grew up a preacher's kid and some because of common sense. I have seen my dad get some gifts that as a little kid I thought, "Seriously, you thought that was a good idea?" Okay, so yes it's the thought that counts, and my father always appreciated everything; but if you are going to spend money or time on your Christian friend, get something that they will like.

So I want to give you seven things not to gift to your Christian friends for Christmas this year.

1. Covered in Prayer Snuggie. Honestly, who thought that was a good idea? You should never buy a regular Snuggie for anyone (who needs a one size fits all blanket? Aren't all blankets one size fits all?), but one that says "Covered in Prayer" makes me a little nervous. Google it and check out the advertizement. The woman modeling for it couldn't look any more miserable. If you buy this for your pastor, I hope it's as a joke. 
2. Something with Scripture on it. Like the Football Popcorn Bowl with Lid. This is a popcorn bowl with guess what? A lid. The bowl has a football theme and Philippians 4:13 on it. Men don't go and get their "Football Popcorn Bowl with Lid" before the big game. Let me give you some advice. Just because Scripture is on a gift doesn't mean you should buy it. I understand the principle behind it, but if you have to put Scripture on the product just to sell it, then your product sucks.
3. Books. Books make great gifts, but only give it if you've read it first or if it's appropriate. For instance, don't buy Billy Graham's Nearing Home. I want to read this book, so it's not a knock on the book. But don't buy it for a friend because they may get the idea that you are hoping for something to happen to them. 
4. Food that they can't eat. Food is one of the best gifts to give, but before you give it to them, do some research. From time to time my dad would get food with peanuts in it. Which would be great, if he wasn't deathly allergic to them. Ask their spouse or someone close to them before you bake them something to see if they like it and will eat it. The last thing you want to do is put your friend into a food coma and to be tried for attempted murder. If you make them something and you're not sure if they can eat it or not, definitely don't buy Nearing Home because then there would be motive.
5. "Clean Hands, Pure Heart" Hand Sanitizer. Your Christian friend doesn't want you to buy them hand sanitizer for Christmas. This is in the same category as "Testamints". Yes my friends, these are actual products for sell...I can't make stuff this good up.
6. Christian Movies. I don't quite know how to say this; but only buy your friend a Christian movie if you've seen it first (see item #3)   Just because it's "Christian" doesn't mean that people should be forced to watch it. Trust me, no Christian needs more than one copy of Facing the Giants and The Love Dare (which really weren't bad movies). Christians are people who like good movies (unfortunately, some even like porn...don't buy them porn).
7. Calendars. Thank God smart phones are being used these days. One the worse gifts you can buy someone is a calendar with images that your grandmother would love. Yes, it's practical, but still ugly. The good news is if you've already bought the calendar, you can give it to your grandmother (chances are you bought her the same calendar already). If you want to buy them a calendar, go to Stuff Christians Like and buy the desktop calendar. That would be sweet!

If you choose to buy your Christian friend a present this year, buy them something you'd want. If you are a woman buying for a male refer to their same species before purchasing. If you are buying for a female, do the same--certainly don't ask me; I have a hard enough time buying for my wife.

Question:
Any ideas on what not to buy your Christian friends for Christmas?