Nine Ways to Make Tonight's Debate Better

I'm not going to lie, the last presidential debate was so boring. A teenager would have more fun at a Southern Baptist Saturday night revival on prom night. My wife hit R.E.M. sleep while watching it. Seriously, I thought she was dead when I tried to wake her up for bed. I had to force myself to watch it and only to make wise cracks on Twitter.

All the two men gave us was that they are both telling the truth and that the other one is lying. In an "either/or" society this "both/and" strategy is really messing with me. After watching the Town Hall Debate turned into a musical on Youtube, it has me thinking...we can do so much better than that. After all, we are America!

So here are nine suggestions to the Commission on Presidential Debates (CPD) on how they can make tonight's debate better:

1. Have you noticed how neither candidate really likes to answer the questions? So for half of the debate only yes or no questions can be asked. And only yes and no answers may be given. (I thought a true/false format would be better, but they already do that.)
2. The two candidates can't say the others person's name or the following words: "mess", "Big Bird", "plan", "gang-bangers", "trillion", "China", "Olympics", "rich", "Detroit" and "truth". 
3. A round where Romney guesses what is in Obama's hand.
4. Stephen Colbert moderates the debate. He isn't putting up with any lies and they would be too afraid to lie around him.
5. At some point President Obama gets to surprise Romney and mess up his perfect news anchor lego man hair.
6. For the final round the two have to see if they can agree on something. On anything! Even if it's their favorite flavor Skittle. There's a 50/50 chance that it is either red or purple.
7. The debate is from the counterfeit Apple Store in China. Nothing better to prove how tough the other will be on China than to debate on foreign soil.
8. The two men have share a plate a fish tacos. Because let's face it nothing brings two men together like a plate of fish tacos.
9. Something has to get blown up during the debate. We love action movies, so why not add an action scene? I wouldn't mind seeing which man would make better decisions in a mock national security crisis. 

I know it's too late for the CPD to make these changes, but here's to hoping for a more interesting debate tonight. Regardless, if you are planning to vote you need to watch the final debate for yourself tonight. Don't watch the recaps that people with an agenda have put together. Be a wise voter when it comes to the issues.
 
Question:
Do you have any tips on how to make the debate better?