I Hate Christian Tracks

I'm not going to lie. I'm not a big fan of Christian tracks. In fact, I hate them. It's not for scriptural reasons, but personal preference. Most of the time I feel like the people who hand them out are trying to check off a checklist. They want to say that they have shared the "gospel". The gospel is more than placing a piece of paper on the back of a toilet. Which by the way no sane person is ever going to touch, because you know what people do in bathrooms don't you? All the person did was liter and make some man or woman's job more difficult later.

But when a nine-year old girl gives you a track, your mind starts racing with possibilities. This happened to me this past week. A girl practically threw it at me without making eye contact and was out of there like I was a spawn of Satan.

Here are nine thoughts that went through this Christian's mind at that moment:

1) Ah, how sweet this child thinks that there is a chance that I go to hell and wants to help me. A warm fuzzy passes over me.

2) Following the last thought...oh wait! This child thinks I'm going to hell! What did I say or do to make them think that I wasn't a Christian? Don't they read my blog? They probably aren't a Christian for not reading it! God please forgive her.

3) Ah, how sweet this child has been brainwashed by their church to hand out propaganda. Must be from the ____________ . Sorry for the blank, but some of you might get offended if I said the denomination that came to mind. Don't worry I love them too.

4) Who comes up with these pictures? The dude isn't wearing a belt and his zipper is down. (Made you look.)

5) Shouldn't Jesus be wearing Toms?

6) Does Jesus really have a halo? And why is he clawing this man with a death grip?

7) Oh he is saving him from falling into hell below. If Jesus has a halo, can't he just fly? He should definitely wear a cape instead of a robe. That would be cool! Super Hero Jesus!

8) What's up with the peace lilies? Why not roses? Or better yet something that can live near a really hot environment, since hell is like two inches away. I should probably buy my wife flowers soon.

9) The church should hand these out as coupons. Bring this track with you and get five percent off of your next tithe.

The track was a little corny. But I will say when I flipped it over, it didn't get much better. With one exception. One of my favorite Bible verses was on it.

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" 

2 Corinthians 5:17.

I love this verse. Christian, you would do well to memorize this promise. To think that if we are in Christ, we are a new creation. You are a new creation. The old has passed away!

Even though I loathe track ministries, I have to say that it took some guts for that nine year old girl to throw it at me. I could have beat her up (maybe, my Axiron is in the mail). I could have made fun of her. Worse, I could have rejected her. Regardless, it took guts and she cared enough to do something. My prayer for myself and for you today is that we care enough to do something for God. Just please don't let it be Christian tracks.